26/10/2010

26/10/2010 - 13 days old

Well. Two steps forward one step back with breastfeeding. I now have thrush so have to treat my boobs and Monkey's mouth. Apparently it's because of the cracks and grazes. I'm also like a leaky tap. When, oh when, does it all settle down?

DH is at work today. We coped ok yesterday but I only had a half hour sleep. Had a visit from a nurse who has signed me up for a PND support group. It starts tomorrow, up at the health centre. I feel like it could help, but am also worried about slipping into a real depression.

Monkey and i went for a long walk with the pram yesterday. Bit sore today so i hope I didn't overdo it. planning to take it easy today. She's crying now, and due for a feed. I think we'll both try and lie down after that for a sleep.

Later... Last night was a bit rough - we went to bed after an EBM bottle feed at about 11. She cried and grizzled until 1, when I fed her again, then cried more so I sent hubby off to the spare room to sleep. Finally got monkey to sleep in our bed in her carrier at about 2.30. Woke at 5 for a feed, then hubby came in and got her at about 7. I managed another half hour sleep before I had to get up in order for him to go to work. I've now spent the morning tidying the house, ready for the cleaner to come this afternoon (silly, I know, but it was embarrassingly messy). I get a cleaner for four weeks paid for by the hospital as family are so far away and we had a c/s.

Feeling more positive about the world today. I would love to have the energy to walk down to the river with the pram, or just get out in the sunshine, but sleep is my number one priority today. Maybe later this evening all of us will go for a walk. I miss my hubby - it seems we're like ships in the night, barely spending any time together the last 24 hours. I don't want him over-tired for work, and I need sleep too, but I really want to just hang out! Maybe next week when my family visits they can watch Monkey for an evening and we can go out for dinner.

Ok, grizzly-guts is definitely hungry. Going to try another breastfeed. Wish me luck!